Non Drum Related Update

[johnnyringo]

Sorry this is not drum related and I hope the administrators will allow it, I just wanted to give a quick update on my wife.
About a month ago she was released from hospital and was sent home on hospice and my care. After a few weeks, we decided to put her in a group home where she would get round the clock attention. This is a small house she shares with 3 other residents and a live in caregiver. There's also a nurse and Dr. who are there regularly. Although they are not licensed to do physical therapy, they are trying to make her stronger with light exercising in hopes she can return home in a few months.
It's a very nice place and she likes being there, but because of Covid, I'm only allowed to visit twice a week for about an hour.
It's tough being alone after living with her for 14 years.

[salty 1322]

johnnyringo,
You are among friends here. I think we all understand your need to "get things off your chest" and keep your fellow-members informed. It must be very difficult for both you and your wife to be separated during these tough times. I know it would be unbearable for me. By posting, you are showing what a caring empathetic human being you are. My heart goes out to you. The world needs more people who feel such love. Best of luck to you, sir.
Brian

[nickmues]

Johnnyringo,

Wishing and praying for a speedy recovery for her and getting back to normal for the two of you.

Nick

[jccabinets]

Sorry to hear this Mark. Its gotta be very hard to be alone and worry about your wife like that, I hope the therapy goes well and she is home very soon!

[idrum4fun]

Hi JR!

We all greatly appreciate these updates from you. So glad to hear that your wife is in a group home that she enjoys. That's half the battle! You are blessed and fortunate that you are at least able to visit a few times a week, even though each visit is for a very short duration. I have a personal friend who can only visit his mom from the front window where she lives, which has been like this for 6 months now.

You're among friends here. Please keep us informed.

-Mark

[amosguy]

Sorry to read this. Know you have support and prayers from this forum.

[johnnyringo]

Originally Posted by salty 1322

johnnyringo,
You are among friends here. I think we all understand your need to "get things off your chest" and keep your fellow-members informed. It must be very difficult for both you and your wife to be separated during these tough times. I know it would be unbearable for me. By posting, you are showing what a caring empathetic human being you are. My heart goes out to you. The world needs more people who feel such love. Best of luck to you, sir.
Brian

Thanks Salty, I do love her very much.
I feel a bit guilty, I was taking care of her for a few years until it got to the point where I couldn't do it myself anymore. I can't help but thinking that I should had done more, that maybe if I pushed her to do her exercises more, she wouldn't find herself in this predicament. Although she has a brain tumor, has seizures and has gone through a few operations, I blame myself for not doing a better job of taking care of her.

[salty 1322]

Originally Posted by johnnyringo

Thanks Salty, I do love her very much.
I feel a bit guilty, I was taking care of her for a few years until it got to the point where I couldn't do it myself anymore. I can't help but thinking that I should had done more, that maybe if I pushed her to do her exercises more, she wouldn't find herself in this predicament. Although she has a brain tumor, has seizures and has gone through a few operations, I blame myself for not doing a better job of taking care of her.

Please, do not blame yourself. The word "if" is one of the most powerful in the English language. "If" we had all done things differently then perhaps there might have been different outcomes. Maybe not. All of us suffer through this. Nothing can change the outcome. Like everyone, I too feel remorse and guilt for what I might have done to prevent certain situations. PLEASE don't blame yourself for something over which you have no control. In my opinion, you seem to be a very empathetic, kind and loving human being. Hang in. You are supported by friends. At this point, my eyes have begun to tear over and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Thinking of you and your beautiful wife. Like a wise man once said, "All you need is love."
Brian

[johnnyringo]

Originally Posted by salty 1322

Please, do not blame yourself. The word "if" is one of the most powerful in the English language. "If" we had all done things differently then perhaps there might have been different outcomes. Maybe not. All of us suffer through this. Nothing can change the outcome. Like everyone, I too feel remorse and guilt for what I might have done to prevent certain situations. PLEASE don't blame yourself for something over which you have no control. In my opinion, you seem to be a very empathetic, kind and loving human being. Hang in. You are supported by friends. At this point, my eyes have begun to tear over and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Thinking of you and your beautiful wife. Like a wise man once said, "All you need is love."
Brian

Hey, I'm not afraid to admit it either, I find myself crying nearly every day since she was taken to the hospital. I try not to think about it, but just living here reminds me of her, I made her lunch and dinner everyday, I'm not much of a cook, but she loved it.
Here's a picture I love, we took this about five years ago, trying to capture John Lennon's Double Fantasy album.

[salty 1322]

Originally Posted by johnnyringo

Hey, I'm not afraid to admit it either, I find myself crying nearly every day since she was taken to the hospital. I try not to think about it, but just living here reminds me of her, I made her lunch and dinner everyday, I'm not much of a cook, but she loved it.
Here's a picture I love, we took this about five years ago, trying to capture John Lennon's Double Fantasy album.

That is the most beautiful photo imaginable!
Brian